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If you really think about it, could you put your life ethos into words? Likewise, if your spouse's mother needs to either go to a nursing home or move into your home, are you willing to give up time and resources to allow that?
Decide now who can or wants to stay home with kids, who can make a career sacrifice and for how long.
Everyone wants to believe that the trust between partners is unbreakable, but the fact of that matter is that trust is very, very breakable.
From something small, like snooping through texts, to something bigger like infidelity, how will you deal with it?
Bonus points if you actually have fun working together.
My ex and I couldn't even pick up a paintbrush without getting into World War III, and I eventually realized that you don't want a partner you can't complete tasks with.
If they need to talk a fight out immediately after having it, but you're the type who needs to mull conflicts over for a few days, how will you handle it when one or both of you is mad?
You may have heard of the book The 5 Love Languages .
The distinction is symbolic and, from some feminist perspectives, very important—but also the distinction is vanishingly slight.
I haven't made it down the aisle quite yet (that's another article for another day) but as a wedding planner, I get to talk to many newly engaged couples.
One of the first things I like to ask them is how they knew that he or she was the one.
The flip side of that is that I crave the same thing, and if your partner is unable to show love in the way that you need it, that can be a problem. The 5 Love Languages, .59, Amazon This sounds like a philosophical question, but I think it probes deeper than asking "What are your core beliefs?
" By asking someone what rules, guidelines, or statements they live by, you're asking them a question that will give you insight into how they handle everything from problems at work to conflicts within a relationship. What if one of you gets a dream job offer in Seattle, but you had previously agreed to stay close to your families?